


Appearances

by obiwhat12



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Erwin Smith - Freeform, Established Levi Ackerman/Erwin Smith, Established Relationship, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Levi Ackerman - Freeform, Levi Ackerman Needs a Hug, Levi Ackerman/Erwin Smith - Freeform, Levi Ackerman/Erwin Smith Fluff, M/M, My First AO3 Post, Nonbinary Hange Zoë, Relationship(s), Sick Character, Sick Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Sickfic, Whump, hange zoe - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-06
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-18 09:56:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,316
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29856357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/obiwhat12/pseuds/obiwhat12
Summary: The Scouting Legion is preparing for another expedition, there are many tasks to be done and interior officials to be met with. In the haze of this chaos, Levi allows his health to decline for the sake of his duty, the maintaining of his impenetrable persona. Erwin will be forced to decide what is more important to him, the concern he has for Levi or the appearances they are both expected to uphold.
Relationships: Levi Ackerman/Erwin Smith
Comments: 10
Kudos: 55





	1. Unfamiliar Warmth

**Author's Note:**

> *(Disclaimer: I do not own Attack on Titan or it's characters, this is just for fun!)

The sun was finally starting to really peek out from behind the curtain. It was quiet on this cool morning, except for the chirps of small birds in the trees. On some rare mornings, Erwin would lay like this. His lover nestled up in his arms, maybe resting on his chest like he was today. He would listen to the man breathe. Soft breaths lifting his back gently up and down. The movement reminded him that Levi was alive, well, and safe in his arms. On occasion, he would stay extra still just to feel the light thumping of his heartbeat against his chest. 

It was rare for him to wake before Levi did, given that the man hardly slept at all. Erwin was pleased when he’d wake up to find the sun peeking over the trees and Levi still fast asleep in his arms. It would mean much deserved rest for him and more time for Erwin to soak up a quiet moment before the chaos.

In these quiet moments, he wasn’t Commander of the Survey Corps. He wasn’t the man who sent hundreds towards their likely deaths every mission. Someone who looked, without visible emotion, towards the dead bodies of comrades. At this moment, he was just a pillow for someone he loved. 

This someone, who was fierce and powerful beyond anyone’s knowledge, looked small and delicate in his arms. He was not Humanity’s Strongest Soldier or the infamous Captain Levi. He was just Levi. A man who liked his tea black, showed affection through off handed comments, and always smelled of lavender soap. 

Erwin’s mind tended to wander from him during these moments. To places that could never be. He imagined marrying Levi, properly. Owning a house somewhere far away and working as a teacher, like his father before him. Peeking the pure imaginative minds of children and then returning home to the arms of the one person he could never part with. He imagined spending years together, growing out ragged beards and rocking on a porch until they were old and grey. Levi would still be so beautiful. It seemed that age held no purchase over someone as beautiful as Levi. His hair would grey but he would shine on.

Erwin softly ran his fingers through Levi’s silky dark hair. No matter what rough calluses covered his skin after his years of service, his hair stayed the same. So soft and delicate, slipping through Erwin’s fingers like water in his hands. As the hair fell through once more, Erwin rested his hand gently on the back of his lover’s head. There was a strange warmth there that was unfamiliar. Just as he moved his hand to investigate further, Levi stirred.

“Mm…?” His voice was deep, thick with sleep as he murmured into Erwin’s chest.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you.” Erwin spoke softly and moved his hand lower to caress Levi’s back before resting it there.

“Doesn’t matter… What time is it?” He brought a fist to his eyes and rubbed them to wake himself a bit. Erwin knew how Levi was, once he was awake he’d be awake for the day. 

“Around 7:00 I’d imagine.” He hadn’t looked at the clock since he woke up to the sun peaking through his shades. He assumed that he spent 30 minutes just laying there since then.

“Shouldn’t have let me sleep that long. And what were you doing? Staring at the peeling wallpaper?” 

It was a joke, or whatever you would call Levi’s dry humor. Erwin breathed through a smile. 

“Something like that.” With Erwin’s hand on Levi’s back, he sensed heat there as well, even through his shirt.

Levi sighed and moved slightly, a sign that he was going to get up soon. Erwin kept his hand in place gently, keeping his captain in place as well.

“You feel warm. Are you alright?”

Levi’s back stiffened underneath Erwin’s touch. 

“Probably just hot from you suffocating me all night.” He rolled to his side. “Now, let me up, we’ve got a ton of shit to do.”

“Language, darling.” Erwin moved his hand off of his back and leaned himself up against the headboard. “And yes, I guess we do have a few things on the list.” He put his head to the side, watching as Levi stretched, looking somewhat like a cat, before he raised himself up from bed. The bed creaked softly from the weight leaving it. 

“You’ve got about a thousand meetings with those interior swines and I’ve got 4 groups of snot-nosed brats to train, yeah I’d say that’s a hefty list.” Levi sounded annoyed. Erwin knew by now that it wasn’t directed at him. He was almost always annoyed by something, but never Erwin.

“That means I probably won’t see you until dinner.” Erwin pouted a bit, so Levi could hear it through his voice. He turned, as to be expected. Levi’s face was softer than usual, almost hinting at playful. Or as close as he’d let it get to playful.

“Don’t get greedy with me.” Levi’s voice was deep and a bit grated as he walked forward and planted a soft kiss on Erwin’s cheek. 

“No promises.” Erwin responded, looking even more playful as he swung his legs over the side of the bed and stood. 

Levi went over to the dresser to where he had already laid out both of their outfits for the day, folded neatly the night before. He grabbed his stack and walked into the bathroom, speaking before disappearing behind the door. “Make the bed.”

“Love you too, dear.” Erwin smiled as he watched him close the door. 

Of course, the first thing Erwin did was make the bed, folding the corners without a crease as he did so. Just as he was about to exit the room to make them both a bit of tea, he overheard a muffled cough. Then another. It was a slight fit of coughing coming from the bathroom until the water of the bath began to wash over the sound. Odd. 

Of course, Levi could’ve simply been clearing his throat. All the while, it was a foreign sound to Erwin. In the years that he’d known the man, he’d never seen him get sick. Not even a slight cold. So it might’ve been the sudden vulnerable sound that perked his attention. However, the warmth to his skin from earlier did not lessen Erwin’s suddenly formed anxiety.

A part of Erwin wanted to knock on the bathroom door to confirm that his anxieties were unwarranted. However, he knew that Levi liked his space, especially when he was taking a bath. So he left the room, finding new distractions in his search for tea.

—

The mirror fogged over as the heat radiating from the bath filled the room quickly. Levi hovered over the sink as the heat waves washed over him uncomfortably. Usually, it would be a welcomed feeling in contrast to the chill of morning, but today he felt suffocated. He coughed again, into his fist this time to muffle the sound. 

His chest felt a bit tight as the thick air got trapped inside. His head even felt a wave of dizziness. As the water filled up towards the brim, Levi shut it off. He was tempted to open the door of the room to let some of the hot air out, but he resisted it. If he came out of the room huffing and puffing, Erwin would never let him hear the end of it. He was ever the worry wart. In his mind, Levi told himself that he was well. He’d be fine, it was the warm air that irritated his lungs and he was overheated from setting the water too high. But he knew deep down that something wasn’t right.

Something had been off for a few days now. He’d been so busy with training rounds and planning the expedition that he hardly had time to notice the signs as they crept up on him. He was getting worn down.

Dipping his body into the water, he immediately wanted to get out. He felt heat rise in his cheeks as a wave of cloudy vision washed over him. Just get clean and get out as soon as possible. He heaved breaths as he willed through the dizziness and washed himself clean as quickly as he could. Levi had to take a breath with soap still lingering in his hair, dripping down the side of his face along with beads of sweat. He leaned his head against the wall of the bathtub. 

It was ridiculous. He’d gone and overheated himself in the bath like a child. He cursed under his breath as he lazily washed the rest of the soap off of himself and drained the bath. This was the tricky part. Standing again. Purely working on willpower, he fought through yet another dizzy spell as he wrapped a towel around himself and dried himself off. His skin felt irritated and stifling as he ran the fabric over it. After bringing his clothes over himself, he covered his head with the towel and left the room as soon as he could.

The cool air hit him instantly, feeling like sudden relief only to be quickly replaced by chill. His equilibrium was utterly out of sorts. It was like his body didn’t know what temperature to maintain. He covered his face with the towel and lowered himself on the edge of the bed as Erwin came in with two cups of warm black tea.

“Wow, that was quick.” Erwin seemed surprised as he put a cup on the bedside table. Levi always took quick baths for the efficiency and time constraints of his work, but this was insanely fast.

“You’re up next.” His voice was hoarse, he cursed himself as he cleared his throat. “Thanks for the tea. I’ll see you tonight”

“Yes, of course.” Erwin sounded distracted. Like he was deep in thought, or trying to deduce something. He was staring at him, Levi could tell. He hadn’t moved from the spot in front of him. He watched his feet from under the towel.

Finally, the feet retreated and he heard the sound of the bathroom door closing. Then he ran the towel through his wet hair and laid back on the bed, letting his feet hang lazily off the side. He was shivering now, a slight chill in his bones that wasn’t there before. 

“Ugh, damn it all.” Levi whispered and gathered himself off of the bed with his hair nearly dry. His head spun again and it was now more annoying than concerning to him. He brushed through his hair in front of the mirror, hung over Erwin’s dresser, and caught a glimpse of the bright flush to his cheeks. He looked as though he’d been sunbathing for two days straight. He gathered the tea from the side table into his shaking hands and walked out of Erwin’s bedroom for the day.

They both had their own jobs to do. Erwin had to meet with the interior officials first hand and discuss the plan for the expedition and the goals of their observations. Levi was to instruct the recruits, proving the Scouts adequacy by example should the interior officials wish to observe. Erwin and Levi were both symbols of what the Survey Corps was and they had a responsibility to maintain these archetypes. Levi knew what was at stake and, to him, no small ailment would get in the way of his responsibility.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow u made it this far AGH thank u so much for reading! :) next chapter should be out very soon!
> 
> come say hi on tumblr too! [https://obiwhat.tumblr.com/](%E2%80%9Chttp)


	2. Eyes Meet

The beating sun poured rays over the training yard. Recruits were lunging back and forward with wooden knives, blocking and dodging in the heat. Levi had his head leaned against the exterior wall, sun beating down on him, his legs begging to rest for just a short moment. Everything felt sore. His body was aching to the pulsing of the hot sun. He coughed as the sparring between the recruits continued, their movements covering up the muffled sound. As this day had dragged on, his cough had gotten deeper and congested. A rattle had begun to cry out from deep inside his lungs. There was pain there too. In his chest, or more specifically, an ache in his ribs.

That can’t be good, he thought to himself. He was only feeling worse and worse as the hours in the heat drained his energy. He was more than worn out from working too hard. He couldn’t remember the last time he felt this bad. However, the worst part was how quickly his condition was progressing. He'd felt off for some time, but on this particular day he felt absolutely ragged. There were moments when even he wondered if he could finish his responsibilities without collapsing right then and there.

Coughing into his handkerchief once more, he noticed figures nearing the courtyard. No one was scheduled to be out on the training grounds except for the recruits and himself. He straightened his back against the wall and took an account of the group he was supposed to be watching.

Damn brats.

The recruits looked like chaos incarnate. Even with his vision swimming slightly, Levi could see every little imperfection in their drills. And there was quite a lot.

With the officials snooping around today, we can’t afford to look this ridiculous. Levi thought as he brought a hand to his forehead, rubbing in between his eyes. A headache had been bothering him on and off for a few days. Headaches were nothing new to him of course, but these would leave him dizzy with pain. It was a plight he couldn’t afford at the moment.

The figures approached the training yard, quickly coming into view. It was Zachary and some other Sina elitist pig. Levi clicked his tongue in disgust as they scanned the group and landed their eyes on him. They were watching him. The way Hanji looks at her lab rats. He needed to get himself and his messy recruits back into shape and quick.

“You look like a bunch of flailing monkeys! Get your shit together!” The captain’s voice cracked as he raised his voice, shaking off the dizziness as he approached the recruits.

The recruits finished the round of sparing, huffing breaths in the thick heat that had only increased through the afternoon. Their eyes got wide as they caught the captain approaching them after the drills all died down. Throughout most of their training before, he had taken a hands-off approach and watched from the wall across from them. Now he was glaring right at them individually, looking for answers for their lack of performance. They lined up for assessment as Levi made a bee-line for one recruit.

“Schmidt. Explain to me why you’re holding your knife with both hands.” Levi spoke low, his voice grating as his throat had grown sore from disuse.

“Uh… Sir… I can't seem to grip it right... sir.”

“That’s because you’re not practicing. Everyone here is sparring and you’re just doing the same shit over and over.” He held out his hand, beckoning the recruit to hand him the knife for a demonstration.

“Like I already explained about a thousand times now,” He coughed, “Using both your hands gives you more control.” He lunged forward quickly with both hands gripping the knife. The ground below him became a bit blurred as the momentum hit him.

He cleared his throat and straightened himself back up, readdressing the recruits.

“But it leaves your defense open. One hand makes you swift and flexible to adjust to attacks.” Levi flipped the knife into a backhanded position in one hand and lunged forward, slicing left and right swiftly. Now his head was really spinning, vision darkening around the edges. He almost stumbled as he handed the knife back quickly. 

“Do it…” His voice wavered. “Just like that this time.”

Schmidt took the knife back, his fingers brushing for just a second against Levi’s. His eyes went a little wide as he noticed the heat. The captain’s skin was red hot.

I’m the one who’s been doing drills for an hour and his skin is warmer than mine? The young recruit thought, gripping the knife correctly while he stared up at Levi.

As Levi noticed his look, he quickly called the drills back into action again, before the kid could say a word. Then he walked back to the wall, nearly collapsing against it. His head spinning, the heat was getting to him. Out of the corner of his eye he spotted Zachary and the other official returning to the main building. Enjoy the show, piggies? Levi let out a long sigh and leaned his head back again.

He stared down Schmidt as he practiced with the one-handed technique, hardly landing any hits. It was progress, at least. Based on the face he made when Levi handed the knife back, he’d obviously felt the heat coming off of his skin. If a slight touch like that was enough to freak the kid out, then he must’ve been burning up. He hoped that the brat wouldn’t blabber about it to anyone. The last thing he needed was a team of recruits discussing his condition loudly. There was too much at stake for him to be ill. There was even more at stake for him to be seen as ill. With the way the officials stared at Levi, they seemed to expect him to be impenetrable. Illness meant weakness and weakness was one thing that Levi was not known for. If it was proven that he was as weak as anyone else, weak enough to be defeated by a cold, then they might have more reason to cut funding for the Survey Corps all together.

There were only two more groups left for Levi to instruct. After this, he could skip dining hours and go straight to bed. The officials would be out of their hair finally. Erwin and he could finally get some well deserved rest. He let his mind fade to that place. Daydreaming of being in Erwin’s arms. Where he could rest through this fever and wake up whole again, safe and warm.

Rest. There was nothing he wanted more than to rest…

—

The day was long and tedious as usual. When preparing for an expedition, Erwin was in charge of orchestrating teams, attack patterns and dealing with interior legislation. He had to pitch each expedition before the panel of officials with clear and concise information. These meetings, of course, took far longer than required. 

Along with the visitation of the interior officials, came to equally burdensome eyes of the interior officials. The watchful eyes looked for any kind of flaw. If one hair was out of place, they would speak up about it. The entire week prior to this day had been spent drilling perfection into everyone’s routine. Recruits of course had some leeway, but the commanding officers had to be in top shape.

By the time Erwin was through with the initial hearing, he was given a short break before he would report privately with Zachary. During this time, he followed the large corridors towards the dining hall. It was bustling with young recruits’ voices which turned soft immediately as he entered. They saluted, which he dismissed quickly as he gathered some lunch for himself. 

Suddenly, someone slammed into his back, nearly knocking the tray from his hands. “Whoopsie! Didn’t see you there Erwin!” Hanji apologized, looking more concerned with the microscope slide they were studying as they piled food on their plate.

“Not a problem. What do you have there?” Erwin replied as he picked up a bread roll and a coffee to complete his tray of food.

“Oh this?” Hanji’s attention was now perked. They held up the slide into Erwin’s eye-line, a bit too close. “I’m analyzing a strand of Sawney’s hair— although it broke my heart to take the sample!” They seemed thoroughly disturbed by that part of the story. 

“It’s fantastic isn't it? It hasn’t even dissolved yet! I’m trying to see how long I can trap the sample in this slide to study.” Hanji explained picking up their tray and carrying it to the table where section leaders usually sat during dining hours. 

On a usual day, Levi would join them as well. However, today he would have a tighter schedule and therefore a later lunch. There was a larger recruit group this month and section leaders were short staffed. Erwin had tried to convince him to take less groups to instruct, but he insisted that no one would train them hard enough if he didn’t do it himself.

“Let me know if it stays in one piece, it would be interesting to learn the rate of dissolubility.” 

“Exactly! With Levi cutting them to itty bitty pieces all the time, I never get the chance to study the active dissolubility rate in the field.” Hanji gave a little pout and swallowed a roll while keeping their eyes on the slide. “Have you seen him yet today?”

Erwin had spent the night with him, but of course he wouldn’t mention that aloud in a crowded dining hall. “No, I’ve been in meetings with the interior officials since earlier this morning.”

“He’s been looking a little pale lately.” Hanji blurted out bluntly, caressing the slide with one finger. 

Erwin tried to hide the worry crossing over his face. If Hanji had noticed Levi's appearance, even so absorbed in their work, then he must’ve really looked pale. A sudden urge to go to the training yard overcame him. However, as per usual, he regained his composure.

“He’s insisted on training multiple groups. I haven’t been able to successfully talk him out of it.” Erwin responded plainly while sipping his coffee.

“That’s shorty for you. Runs himself ragged, even if he doesn’t show it.” Hanji sighed dramatically as they finally focused on eating instead of the slide.

He does show it. Erwin knew how Levi was at the end of each night. He knew how the exhaustion could progress through his longest days, leaving him drained and aching at the end of the night. They both had seen that side to one another. Levi only trusted Erwin to see him so weak.

Trying to deter the conversation, Erwin finished his coffee and stood to throw away his tray. “Write up a report on that dissolving experiment, I’ll be anxious to read it.” He wasn’t being entirely truthful, but it got Hanji off of the subject.

Their eyes perked up. “Yes siree!” They saluted playfully, smiling as Erwin nodded and left.

Immediately focused back on Levi, he walked casually back through the long corridor. He had enough time before his meeting with Zachary, he could afford to at least see for himself how Levi was doing. 

He knew something was wrong in the morning. After his bath, Levi had been covering his face with his towel, sitting on the edge of the bed. Usually, mornings with Levi were a bit of a whirlwind. He was quick to get clean and dressed and out of the door, but he lingered on this morning. He had been resting, he could’ve been feeling too weak to walk. Erwin’s pace unconsciously picked up speed. 

He found himself overlooking the wide range of the training field, dedicated to training and formation practice. He spotted the group quickly. It was the last group of the day, scheduled directly after lunch until dinner. They were practicing combat drills. His eyes searching a bit frantic, Erwin spotted Levi. 

There was a figure watching over the group, leaning against the wall. One arm was folded over his chest tightly, while the other rubbed the side of his forehead. One could mistake this for disapproval, but Erwin could tell immediately that his head was aching. 

Erwin inched his way closer, tempted to walk right up to the group and cancel the practice. Something wasn’t right, he could feel it in the pit of his stomach. It was the same feeling he got on missions when something was about to go horribly wrong. As his view of the captain got clearer, he noticed the small movement to his figure.

Yes, he could see it clearly. Levi was shaking on his feet. His head was tilted down, as if the weight of it was steadily becoming too much to bear. At any second he might even…

“Le—” With a soft voice, Erwin reached out his hand slightly when he was interrupted by a heavy hand on his shoulder.

“Scary one, that captain of yours.” Zachary spoke from behind him. “I’ve caught a few glimpses of him in action with the recruits today, he doesn’t let anything past him does he?”

Zachary. Impressions are essential. Erwin’s mind was clearing again, focusing back on his objective. He knew that in order to gain approval from the interior, every working function of the Survey Corps needed to seem flawless. Expeditions were for the betterment of humanity, they were important to its survival. Levi was fine, from Zachary’s perspective. Erwin’s strongest piece, in fact. And he would have to stay that way.

“Levi has the keenest eye I’ve ever seen in a soldier.” Erwin recovered his voice quickly. “He is training our new recruits today. They will go far under his teachings.”

Levi suddenly moved away from his position against the wall, Erwin got a horribly feeling. He looked as though he might stumble. Sweat shone on his skin as the setting sun hit it, he pointed sharply at a few lacking recruits. His voice was hoarse but strong as he yelled out a correction, immediately sending them into action again.

“Yes, it seems so.” Zachary chuckled and turned to walk down the corridor towards Erwin’s private office. “Shall we, Commander?”

Don’t let your eyes linger. Erwin had to remind himself to look away. He felt as though he was being pulled away from the scene by an unknown source. He wanted to stay. He wanted to stop all of this. He wanted to know that Levi was alright and hold him close. 

Just as he began following Zachary, as his head slowly turned, their eyes connected from afar. Just for a moment. It felt as though time had stood still and they were alone in a different plane. Levi’s eyes were unfocused and glazed, Erwin’s responded with desperation and concern. Something in Levi’s look told him to carry on, to complete their shared duty. It was an unspoken reminder of Levi’s devotion to him and his cause. Freedom.

Then the connection split. Erwin turned his head and kept up with Zachary’s pace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank u for reading!! kudos and comments are very much appreciated!! :o
> 
> lil bit of hanji content in this chap! hanji is my fav aot character so u know i had to add at least a little scene with them heheh ;) 
> 
> things are starting to heat up! (just like levi's temp smhhh)


	3. Dead Faint

The meeting was long. Time was dragging its ugly self so slow that Erwin thought the night might actually never end, just to spite him. Zachary had many questions at first but then he insisted on discussing leadership in the Survey Corps. He was curious by nature, it seemed. However, after nearly two hours had passed, their tea had grown cold, and Erwin’s mind no longer focused on the conversation.

He thought of Levi’s eyes. They were usually instantly familiar. A steel blue, shining with determination. He had found them to be a dull color when they locked with his own, hours before. They looked to be washed out by what he assumed to be a feverish glaze. Erwin couldn’t pull the image from his mind. 

What if something happens? What if he’s really sick? 

He tried to remind himself that Levi was a grown man. He was strong and fiercely independent and had taken care of himself nearly his entire life. If he was truly sick, he would be able to handle it. 

It was the lies that bothered Erwin the most. Or Levi’s obvious neglectfulness towards telling the truth. Why would Levi have a reason to hide an illness? They had spent so many vulnerable moments together, weakness shouldn’t be something to hide. Unless he had a reason. 

“Well, enough of my rambling. I was supposed to be back…” Zachary checked his watch and winced at the time shown. “...an hour ago. I’d better run.”

Erwin stood with him, shaking his hand with the fakest smile he’d probably ever performed. 

“It was wonderful to meet with you and the rest of the officials again. I’m eager to report back to you with the findings of our expedition.” 

“Best of luck, Commander.” Zachary nodded, hauling his coat over his shoulders and exiting Erwin’s office. 

As soon as the door shut, Erwin breathed out a long breath. He stood there in silence, counting sixty seconds in his head. He wouldn’t leave directly after Zachary, even though something in the back of his mind told him to make a break for it. He counted in silence, trying to avoid tapping his foot nervously.

When he hit a minute of waiting, he hastily flung his coat on and rushed out of his office. The night was colder than the day, a brisk chill swept over the hot day that faded away. The dining hall was empty when he walked by, as to be expected, dining hours were over an hour ago. 

He wasn’t even sure where exactly to look, next up was Levi’s office. Erwin tried to suppress his brisk walk in case anyone were to spot him, but no one was out at the moment. He followed the corridors, until he found himself swinging open Levi’s office door without even caring to knock. Empty, not even a lantern left on. Next. 

Erwin sped up. He walked hastily towards Levi’s bedroom, a route he’d taken so many times he didn’t even need to think about each turn.

His mind was preoccupied, thinking the worst. What if he collapsed somewhere? Should he check the infirmary first? The way Levi looked earlier told Erwin all he needed to know about his condition. It filled his mind with worry.

As he was speeding through another agonizingly long corridor, a door suddenly flung open to the left of him. The harsh movement caused him to slide to a slower pace, just to catch a glimpse of dark hair. His feet came to a halt as he turned his head slowly to get a better look.

Levi was hanging off of the doorway of a public bathroom. Sweat covered his forehead and the collar of his shirt, his cheeks flushed with feverish glow. He looked exhausted, barely standing on his shaking legs, just heaving in breath after breath like he couldn’t possibly fill his lungs to capacity. As he slowly lifted his head to spot Erwin, it was if a switch went off. He straightened where he stood and tried to look more presentable.

Erwin couldn’t tell if Levi even knew who he was. He was looking through him. His eyes glazed over completely, looking like a starkly different person from the morning they’d spent together. Erwin’s heart sank into his stomach.

“Levi… It’s just me.” Erwin spoke softly, almost afraid to touch him in case he might crumple where he stood. “It’s me Levi. Are you alright?”

Levi’s face seemed to relax as he recognized Erwin’s calming tone. His legs went a bit weak underneath him. Erwin caught his elbows as he dipped on his feet, heaving for breaths. His chest was rattling, Erwin could hear it clearly now that he was holding him close. He could also recognize a sickening heat emitting from his body. Quickly, he cupped a hand to Levi’s cheek. 

Burning. He was far warmer than Erwin would have thought possible. He should’ve been hospitalized with this kind of fever. Hours ago.

“You’re burning up. How could you be training with this fever? How were you even standing? Levi… you’re never this reckless.” Erwin’s voice held no anger, it was dripping with anxiety. Honest and pure bewilderment.

“Important… Had to look…” Levi’s mumbling was far from coherent, his voice was hardly recognizable in this raspy hoarse tone. 

“The officials…” 

Erwin caught the last words clearly. “They’re gone now. They left. Come with me to the infirmary, okay? You need help, Levi.”

“They’re… not—” Hoarse words were quickly cut off and replaced by a horrible cough and then another. Until Levi went pale in the face and hunched over.

It was a chest rattling coughing fit, one that had obviously been suppressed for a while. Erwin winced at the way it siphoned away Levi’s energy, leaving him reeling in his hands. He rubbed his back as Levi fought through the obvious pain in his chest. He was wrapping his hand around his ribs protectively.

Erwin could feel the shaking of the man's form even through his jacket. He pulled him closer, holding him steady as he tried to regain his breathing. 

“No… get off.” Levi’s voice was stern but quiet.

“Come with me to the infirmary. Please Levi.” Erwin pleaded, eyebrows furrowed in deep concern as he refused to back away. “Everything’s over. There’s no need to keep up appearances anymore. They’re gone now.”

“They're not!” Levi hissed out a whisper, dark eye shadows making him look feral under the light of the hallway. “The… carriage… is still...”

“Levi I don’t understa—”

Levi suddenly perked up and pushed Erwin back slightly, standing up straight on his wavering legs. His knees shook underneath him so he locked them tight to still the motion. Stubbornly planting himself still in the spot. 

A voice approached from far behind Erwin. “Commander. Captain.” Zachary waved from behind them as Erwin turned his head warily.

Damn it.

“Erwin, I’m glad I caught you! I left my briefcase in your office earlier. I must’ve talked up such a storm that it completely slipped my mind. Would you mind?”

“Not at all.” He spoke calmly, instantly collecting himself out of habit. “Levi, that will be all. I’ll see you at the briefing in the morning.”

That’s your out, Erwin thought, take it and rest. Erwin’s eyes were pleading, Levi’s were numb.

“Oh please, walk with us for a while, Captain. I haven’t seen much of you today. We haven’t had a chance to catch up.” 

Erwin cursed the man. He cursed Levi’s stubbornness, he cursed this cold night in contrast to the hot day, he cursed himself most of all for not speaking up. 

Levi’s eyes were unreadable, empty. He didn’t look over to Erwin and as if a puppet master was commanding his motions, he willed himself forward to follow the two of them. 

“How are the new recruits suiting you?”

The question was directed at Levi, although he looked far from prepared to answer it. Polished conversation had never been Levi's strong suit and Erwin severely doubted he would be much better while sporting the fever he had. The cold was seeping through his own jacket, Levi was probably only getting worse in this weather. He cursed inwardly.

“They’re pitiful at the moment.” Levi cleared his throat quietly when his voice came out raspy in his delayed response. “But with the right kind of discipline… they’ll be ready for the next expedition.”

“I’m sure you’ll whip them into shape in no time.” Zachary commented while rounding the corner to the last stretch before Erwin’s office. Just a few more steps Levi. Erwin thought, watching the captain’s every move closely.

“I’d imagine many of them joined the Survey Corps because of you two. Even in the interior, they call you ‘Humanity’s Strongest Soldier,’ did you know that Captain?”

Levi’s eyes were glazing again, he seemed not only disinterested but also disoriented. As if he might stumble and faceplant at any moment. His footing was off, nearing the territory of looking like a drunkard. Finally, he seemed to find some way of responding without being rude.

“Name’s don’t… mean anything… compared to actions.” It didn’t make a lot of sense in context and his words were a bit murmured.

Erwin was quick to rebound off of Levi’s statement to distract Zachary from the delirium of it. “Indeed. Levi has trained up his own squad with the same mentality. They hold the Corps' record for total kills from a squad.” Erwin slid a complimenting fact to uplift Levi’s image and play off Zachary's interest in his skill set.

As they arrived at the office, Erwin quickly unlocked the door and motioned Zachary to enter.

“Ah yes! The infamous Squad Levi. I’m dying to meet them finally as well.” Zachary responded with intrigue as he entered the office and searched for his briefcase.

With Zachary’s back turned, Erwin watched as Levi leaned against the doorway. He hovered his forehead next to it as if he craved nothing more than to rest his head there. Erwin felt the urge to reach over and feel his forehead again, but of course, thought better of it. 

“Damnable thing, it was right here.” Zachary spoke from inside the room, Erwin turned his head back to offer him a polite, patient, smile.

Erwin noticed Levi wince out of the corner of his eye. He could tell that he was using all of his strength just to stay standing, even with his weight leaned against the doorway. He was still holding his ribs protectively, as if they pained him. Erwin wanted so desperately to wrap him in his arms and carry him to the infirmary straight away, but he looked away again as Zachary finally returned to them with his suitcase.

“I’ve got it now, sorry for delaying you two.” He noticed Levi, seeing him in the light of the lanterns of the office. Erwin noticed a change to his expression. His eyebrows lowered as if in realization of something.

He was going to say something. How could anyone not say something? Levi looks like he’s going to die on his feet. Erwin thought nervously.

Then Zachary’s expression changed once more as he faced Erwin. “I’ll be off. Thank you for your hospitality as always. Take care.”

Erwin and Levi stood there, completely still, as they watched Zachary walk down the corridor towards the carriages. The door to Erwin’s office was still open as Levi leaned his back against it now, not even bothering to wave with Erwin. 

They both waited in silence as the carriage started to move and then disappeared from their view. As Erwin began to turn his head, but Levi was already falling. His body dropped like a rag doll. The energy he had wasted throughout the day left him hollow and empty as he plummeted towards the stone floor.

Acting quickly, Erwin caught him in his grip and tumbled down with him in a heap on the cold ground. He gasped in panic. “Levi!”

Levi’s eyes were rolled back in their sockets, barely left at slits. His face was ghostly white besides the horrible dark circles under his eyes and the feverish hue of his cheeks. He looked… dead.

“Levi, say something!” Erwin commanded. He felt his pulse points, thankfully finding a heartbeat. Although it was far quicker than in the morning. 

Morning… When he laid with his head on my chest… We should’ve just stayed there all day. Now he’s…

Erwin moved quickly and carefully, he scooped Levi into his arms and started to run. Levi was lighter than normal, Erwin couldn’t help but blame himself for his state. He had allowed him to take on all those extra training sessions, they had interfered with his dining schedule. He was working himself to the bone because of the image they had to sustain for the interior officials. 

“I’m sorry Levi. I’m sorry…” Erwin barely spoke as he was running and he knew Levi wouldn’t hear him, but he repeated it anyway.

Erwin got to the infirmary doors in record time, throwing them open with a free hand and rushing towards a group of nurses stationed at the front desk. They all looked rather alarmed at the scene as they hardly saw the captain in the infirmary and had never seen the commander carry in a patient before. 

“He collapsed. His fever is way too high.” Erwin explained nervously as they led him to a bed to place the captain on. A doctor followed quickly behind them and moved to the other side of Levi once he was prone on the bed.

“Do you know his symptoms?” He asked quickly, scanning Levi with his eyes.

Erwin had to think fast to explain his situation clearly. His mind was racing and all he could manage was to stare at Levi. “Cough, he has a bad cough and his chest was rattling, fast heartbeat, the fever of course… I don’t know…” 

The doctor nodded, focusing on measuring the fever with a thermometer. The nurses around him set up an IV drip. “How long has he been unwell?”

“Um… I don’t know. He got steadily worse through the day but I don’t know if he’s been sick before then. I found him tonight like this.” Erwin explained backing out of the way of the nurses rushing around him. He wanted to hold Levi’s hand tightly as they hovered over him, he knew he’d be confused if he woke to unfamiliar faces.

“I see.” The doctor recorded his temperature and frowned deeply at the result. He shifted places to listen to his breathing and frowned further. “His fever is at 40*C, start antibiotics and pain medication as soon as possible Nurse Adler.”

“Pain medication? Is he in pain?” Erwin’s voice cracked slightly as he felt helpless just standing there watching. 

“He has fluid in his lungs and I believe he has a fractured rib from the coughing.” The doctor prodded Levi’s ribcage for the injury and nodded to confirm his suspicion. Levi still did not stir. Erwin knew he was a light sleeper, he would’ve woken up by now. Why hasn’t he?

“Sir.” The doctor began, breaking Erwin’s stare at the bed in front of him. He looked as though he was repeating himself. “I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you to come back tomorrow. The captain needs rest and recovery.”

Erwin stood completely still, like an unmovable statue. It was already hard enough to be useless in this situation, to have absolutely no control. He did not want to leave Levi’s side after being apart for the entire day. While Levi went through this alone…

Finally, Erwin relaxed his shoulders slightly and nodded solemnly. “Will he be alright?”

“His fever needs to come down significantly and his lungs need to be cleared but if all goes well, he should be alright.”

Should. The wording the doctor used bothered him greatly. It meant he didn’t know for sure. 

“Do you have any idea what’s wrong with him?” Erwin didn’t mean to sound rude but his patience was wearing thin. 

“I’m afraid I can’t answer that just yet. I have an idea of what the cause may be. My guess would be pneumonia based the rapid progression of his symptoms and the severity of his condition. However, I won’t know for sure until tests are conducted.” The doctor explained, turning his back to Erwin and focusing on his medical analysis again.

You’re supposed to leave now. Erwin reminded himself, but his legs wouldn't budge. He kept picturing Levi waking up in the infirmary, confused and sick and alone. He could use his superiority to leverage the situation but it would come off as inappropriate. He had to turn and leave, that was all he could do for Levi now.

Erwin took one last glance over his shoulder as more tubes and machines were hooked up to his partner. Then he left the infirmary, leaving the nurses and doctor to hover urgently over their new patient like buzzards on prey. As he dragged himself slowly through the quiet hall, Erwin felt the foreign sensation of tears welling up in his blue eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> zachary: blah blah blaaaaah
> 
> erwin: head empty, just levi :/
> 
> ~~sorry for the wait, I was slumped with uni projects there for a bit! but i'm back now w a new chapter and another coming v soon! (most likely the finale :O) hope you enjoyed it so far, xoxo! kudos and comments are so so appreciated!


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